From "The Way of the Superior Man"
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Free 10-min PreviewFostering Feminine Growth and Openness through Praise and Engaged Love
Key Insight
The feminine thrives on praise and support, in contrast to the masculine which grows through challenge. Men often instinctively challenge to inspire improvement, but this approach only cultivates a woman's masculine side. To nurture her feminine qualities like radiance, health, happiness, and beauty, a man must express 'unabashed' and 'expressed' appreciation. Praise should be specific, frequent, and directed even at nascent qualities to encourage their growth, such as remarking on how 'sexy she is when she sweats in her leotards' rather than criticizing her lack of exercise.
Instead of merely tolerating a woman's 'bitchy and complaining' moods, which reflects a man's weakness and leads to resentment, a superior man actively 'penetrates' these 'tests' with skillful love and perseverance. Intimacy's purpose is mutual growth, and a man's capacity to open a closed heart is a significant gift. While a woman can navigate her own dark moods, a man's 'masculine thunderbolt of love' can illuminate her darkness uniquely. Her 'moods of closure' are a natural, cyclical aspect of the feminine, like weather patterns, and should be embraced and danced with rather than viewed as a burden.
During a woman's emotional intensity, a man should 'stand full, present, and unreactive,' offering unwavering love and consciousness to build trust and allow her to relax. This involves active engagement, such as tickling, dancing, singing, or physically expressed love, instead of analysis or attempts to 'fix' her. He must learn to 'blend with her powerful energy' like wrestling a steer or surfing ocean waves, staying present and giving love, even if 'hurt.' If, after exhausting all creative, humorous, and powerful ways of loving, she still refuses to open, then ending the relationship might be considered, free from anger or resentment, knowing he gave his all.
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